The dividing of attention and the size of my heart are not directly linked. Sometimes I get the feeling that some people feel there is only enough love to fill the heart full and then it remains static. I like to think of my heart as being able to grow with every new friend and to welcome in and keep all who are dear.
My children have the top spot and they know it, but they want to be assured, and sometimes they feel threatened when they realize I turn my attention elsewhere. It's not that they don't want me happy, it's that they feel left out, and realize they are not completely controlling the environment.
I have always tried to be honest and forgiving and above all, understanding in all relationships. In my walk I have tried to find the balance between responsibility and necessity and personal desire. I would never do anything to damage anybody else in any way, no matter what happened in the past. I would feel awful if I ever caused another parental relationship with their children any hardship or difficulties. I know well from my own situation and I believe the Golden Rule.
As important as a parent child relationship is for the growth of the child it is also important for the children to have happy parents and to understand that their parents have a life that is independent from the kids, also. Our children will eventually grow up and have a life of their own, and then they will hope we have one too.